Sunday, June 6, 2010

The Lowdown

I'm that other girl. You know- that friend of a friend, so and so's girlfriend, the girl whose face you think you recognize but just can't remember her name. The girl who is known only by her relation to someone else. The girl who lives on the fringe of everyone else's life.
That's me.
I'm 25 (almost), which means for 25 years I've been this person's daughter, that person's sister, her friend, his girlfriend.
Only.. now I'm not. Your friend who brought me to a party? I've stopped speaking to her. The guy who has been dating me forever? He's not anymore.

Let me explain.

For eight years, I was dating the guy I thought was my soulmate, my other half, my perfect match- pick a cliche, I believed it. We broke up after five and a half years (which included one and a half years of being engaged) because he fell for my best. A year later, we got back together, with him promising to end all communication with his now ex.
Only, he got lonely (we were living 200 miles apart at this point). And he was not entirely comfortable seeing me face to face. So he called her up and they started hanging out again, unbeknownst to me. For 3 years he lied to me about seeing her (and by seeing, I do mean dating), up until he dumped me in January. He claimed that his feelings changed from romantic to platonic. Ouch.
In February he got married to this girl.
In March I found out. It didn't go well. And those mutual friends every couple shares? They all knew and didn't say a word.

So I've cut all but him out of my life (and I"m not entirely sure why I haven't cut him out as well).

Now, for the first time since I was 16, I'm single. I'm not in the town where I went to high school.

Now, I get to find out who I am. I get to find out who this other girl is.

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