Thursday, April 26, 2012


That regular updating thing? So mainstream.

However, I did realize that this is a GREAT place to ramble when my sleep meds start kicking in.

Maybe I will post more when my Rumbelle fandom dies down a bit.

Tuesday, April 10, 2012


Now that I have remembered my password, I'll see about updating more. The internet is a great written monologue waiting to happen, no?

Can I claim I was busy? ... no?

I really should update more. Like, woah.

So, if anyone remembers my last post (... last year...) I mentioned some hint about love on the horizon.

HA! That was cute. After a miscommunication, he and I determined that we work better as friends. Mostly, I think, because I was crushing on him but he wasn't crushing on me. Sucks, but what can you do? My choices were to lose a friend or put on my big girl panties and move on.

So I did. Somewhat. A little.

But it's much easier now, because he moved. To Portland (Oregon, not Maine, but either way, still far). Not gonna lie, I was bummed. Aside from nixing ANY slight glimmer of a chance of a hope that he would wake up realizing how awesome we could be together, it meant I was, to some degree, losing a friend.

As all you (three) loyal (snort) readers know, I lost pretty much all the friends I'd had since high school when FuckFaceExBoyfriend dumped me. Making friends (and furthermore, TRUSTING them) does not come easily to me these days. Friend in Portland (as we shall now call him) was, as implied, a friend. A good one. We didn't hang out much, but he was the kind of friend who, though we didn't know each other very well or for very long, I could have long, ambling chats with at 1am. Even though he (absurdly) rejected my romantic advances, he was also quick to point out that I was an amazing catch and that it was strange that he didn't return my affections.
He marveled at how I had survived the epic breakup. He thought I was brilliant (which is not something often uttered without alcohol and/or sarcasm).

So yeah. I trusted him and cared about him. I loved him, as I do all my good friends. Therefore, losing a friend to distance has really been bumming me out. I know we live in an age of Facebook and Twitter and e-mail and texting, but when one party rarely uses any of that technology, communication and maintenance of a friendship is extremely difficult. I worry that he, like some many before him, will simply vanish across the miles.

And that, simply, makes me sad.